I decided to take up Calie’s challenge and write a blog post about why some people stop going out dressed after a while. This issue was brought up in her introduction to a T-Central featured post from the “All About My Lucy” blog.
I have no doubt that the answer relates back to the gender spectrum and how some people use crossdressing as fun and are not gender dysphoric. Sometimes the two worlds blend but they aren’t the same thing at all.
This was brought home to me a few years ago when I went out with a crossdresser and his wife. The evening was fun and full of interesting conversation but as time wore on I began to realize that there were major differences between this person and myself. For me this was an issue of identity versus for him a social and perhaps sexual turn on which he shared with his wife. They might go out a few times a year like this and then put “her” back in a suitcase.
I am a borderline transsexual and nothing will ever change that. After 54 years of existence I know it deep in my bones.
Gender dysphoric people cannot turn this on and off like a faucet because it is part of their everyday reality. You think about it every day of your existence and it never goes away.
People who are not can put on a dress and go out for an evening and then not think about it again for months. My entire life has been about wishing I could do that and it is also why self-acceptance took me so long to achieve.
I am one of the last people you would have seen voluntarily and just for fun go out for an evening on the town in a dress if I weren't for the way I am. Dressing is a way for me to cope.
Those who are like me will understand my words very well.